Possibly Unpopular Opinion—And I Don’t Care

Let’s talk about cancel culture. It’s getting—or rather, has gotten—completely out of hand. Maybe it’s a generational thing (I’m an 80’s kid) or a cultural thing (getting picked on was basically our second language in lieu of a love language), but I’m not here to create more division or play the victim, because that would be hypocritical.

Today, we have sensitivity training and regular sit-downs with HR, wondering which frenemy colleague reported you for having a dark—okay, let’s be honest, more like morbid—sense of humor. My money’s on the co-worker who wasn’t even part of the conversation, yet somehow clutched their pearls while extracting a Keurig cup.

In 2021, I made it my mission to avoid having to enroll in therapy at all costs (cultural stigma as well as disdain for the people in my life who were currently in therapy). I immersed myself in tens of books and absorbed hours of content from self-help, positive psychology, self-awareness, evolutionary biology, emotional awareness, you name it (essentially lessening the effects of complex PTSD). 

Some of my early favorites include:  The Happiness Hypothesis by Jonathan Haidt and 

 The Coddling of the American Mind: How Good Intentions and Bad Ideas Are Setting Up a Generation for Failure, also co-written by Jonathan Haidt and there’s an excerpt in there that really drives home my perspective. It’s from a middle school graduation speech given by Chief Justice of the U.S., John Roberts—talk about anti-fragility vs. overprotection:

“From time to time in the years to come, I hope you will be treated unfairly, so that you will come to know the value of justice. I hope that you will suffer betrayal because that will teach you the importance of loyalty. Sorry to say, but I hope you will be lonely from time to time so that you don't take friends for granted. I wish you bad luck, again, from time to time so that you will be conscious of the role of chance in life and understand that your success is not completely deserved and that the failure of others is not completely deserved either. And when you lose, as you will from time to time, I hope every now and then, your opponent will gloat over your failure. It is a way for you to understand the importance of sportsmanship. I hope you'll be ignored so you know the importance of listening to others, and I hope you will have just enough pain to learn compassion. Whether I wish these things or not, they're going to happen. And whether you benefit from them or not will depend upon your ability to see the message in your misfortunes."

That speech says it all. Life isn’t about overprotection; it’s about learning from the struggles. Whether you take the lesson from it or let it break you—that’s on you.

On the note of finding evidence that disconfirms my beliefs and that of others here's what two unbiased 🤖 have to say about cancel culture:

Bot #1

(Also 🤖 had this to say to butter me up too 🥰)

"Absolutely, the content effectively mirrors a candid and thought-provoking brand voice. It captures your willingness to engage with uncomfortable truths and challenge commonplace beliefs, portraying you as someone who values personal growth and honest dialogue over mere conformity. This approach fosters authenticity, encouraging an audience that appreciates transparency and a willingness to tackle difficult subjects. The balance of insightful commentary with relatable anecdotes creates a connection with readers, inviting them to reflect on their own perspectives and the societal norms they engage with. Overall, this aligns well with a brand that prioritizes critical thinking and compassionate discourse.

Arguments Against Cancel Culture

Cancel culture, while often well-intentioned, can lead to a range of negative consequences that undermine open dialogue and personal growth. First and foremost, it cultivates an environment of fear and self-censorship, where individuals may hesitate to express their opinions or engage in honest discussions for fear of backlash. This stifling of discourse can hinder the exchange of ideas and prevent constructive conversations about sensitive topics.

Additionally, cancel culture tends to overlook the complexity of human behaviour and the potential for personal evolution. People are often judged by a single misstep or an out-of-context statement, disregarding their overall character or the possibility of learning from mistakes. This lack of nuance promotes a binary view of morality that leaves no room for redemption or forgiveness, leading to an increasingly divisive society.

Furthermore, the collective mob mentality that characterizes cancel culture can result in disproportionate consequences for individuals, often destroying careers and reputations without a fair consideration of the circumstances. Such actions may not only fail to achieve the intended goal of accountability but can also exacerbate misunderstanding and conflict. Therefore, it is crucial to advocate for a more empathetic approach that encourages dialogue, understanding, and growth, rather than one that seeks to punish and eliminate dissenting voices.

Examples of Cancel Culture

Cancel culture manifests in various forms across society, often impacting individuals in the realm of entertainment, politics, and social media. One notable case is the backlash faced by comedian Kevin Hart, who stepped down from hosting the Oscars after old tweets containing homophobic remarks resurfaced, leading to public outrage. Despite his apologies and attempts to grow from the situation, Hart's career saw significant repercussions.

Another instance involves author J.K. Rowling, who faced severe criticism after making comments perceived as transphobic. The backlash from the LGBTQ+ community and its allies led to massive public discussions, calls to boycott her works, and increased scrutiny of her past statements, fundamentally altering her relationship with her fanbase.

Additionally, the fallout from the actions of former chef Mario Batali exemplifies the sexual harassment allegations that can culminate in cancel culture. Following multiple allegations from women, he faced swift professional consequences, losing his restaurant empire and being removed from various television projects.

These examples illustrate the broader implications of cancel culture, demonstrating how individuals can swiftly fall from grace as public opinion shifts, often leaving little room for redemption or reconciliation."

Bot #2

Arguments Supporting the Critique of Cancel Culture

1. Overreach and Intolerance:

   • Argument: Cancel culture often punishes individuals disproportionately for mistakes or unpopular opinions, leading to an environment where free speech is stifled, and people are afraid to express themselves.
   • Supporting Point: This can create a culture of fear where constructive debate and the exchange of diverse ideas are hindered, ultimately damaging the societal discourse.

2. Lack of Forgiveness and Growth:

   • Argument: Cancel culture tends to eliminate opportunities for individuals to learn from their mistakes and grow. Instead of encouraging dialogue and education, it often leads to ostracism.
   • Supporting Point: True personal and societal progress comes from acknowledging mistakes, learning from them, and moving forward—not from erasing people from the conversation.

3. Erosion of Resilience:

   • Argument: By shielding people from uncomfortable or challenging ideas, cancel culture can contribute to a lack of resilience. This can result in a society where individuals are ill-equipped to handle adversity or dissenting opinions.
   • Supporting Point: Exposure to different viewpoints, even those that are challenging or uncomfortable, is essential for developing critical thinking and emotional resilience.

4. Generational Differences:

   • Argument: Older generations, who may have grown up in environments where verbal sparring and tough love were more common, often view cancel culture as an overreaction that coddles individuals rather than preparing them for real-world challenges.
   • Supporting Point: This perspective argues that a certain level of toughness and the ability to withstand criticism are necessary for personal development and success in life.

Counter-Arguments Defending Cancel Culture

1. Accountability and Social Justice:

   • Counter-Argument: Cancel culture is a form of accountability, particularly for those in positions of power who have historically been able to escape consequences for harmful actions or statements.
   • Supporting Point: By holding individuals and institutions accountable, cancel culture can drive positive social change and create a more equitable society.

2. Protecting Marginalized Voices:

   • Counter-Argument: Cancel culture often arises in response to speech or behavior that marginalizes or harms vulnerable communities. It serves as a way to protect those who have historically been silenced or ignored.
   • Supporting Point: By calling out harmful behavior, cancel culture can create a safer and more inclusive environment for everyone, especially for those who have been marginalized.

3. Evolving Social Norms:

   • Counter-Argument: Social norms are constantly evolving, and cancel culture reflects this shift. What might have been acceptable in the past may no longer be considered appropriate, and cancel culture is a way to enforce these new standards.
   • Supporting Point: This process helps society progress and ensures that outdated or harmful practices and ideas are challenged and discarded.

4. Power Dynamics and Consequence:

   • Counter-Argument: Cancel culture often targets those with significant social or economic power. When such individuals face consequences for their actions, it is seen as a necessary correction to an imbalance of power, rather than an overreach.
   • Supporting Point: This can be viewed as a form of social justice, where those who have historically wielded unchecked influence are now being held to account by the public.

Conclusion

The debate around cancel culture is deeply nuanced, with valid points on both sides. On one hand, it can be seen as a necessary tool for accountability and social justice, particularly in a rapidly changing world. On the other hand, critics argue that it can stifle free speech, hinder personal growth, and lead to a less resilient society. The key may lie in finding a balance between holding individuals accountable and allowing space for growth, learning, and redemption. "

I also really like Alain De Botton's explanation on how it's really our job, yes, especially as adults, to manage our emotions/reactions in close relationships and that we should strive to be a pupil and love is a classroom.

Highlights:  Alain de Botton discusses the importance of emotional education, emphasizing that understanding our emotions is crucial for a fulfilling life. He critiques societal expectations around happiness in relationships and careers, advocating for self-knowledge and vulnerability as pathways to deeper connections. Ultimately, he asserts that acknowledging our imperfections fosters compassion and friendship:

32:00 - Transference

35:00 - It's been estimated that a person's life satisfaction 60% dependent on the quality of their primary relationship.

53:00 - Good enough parenting is 👑 no child needs to have a perfect parent in fact, to be a perfect parent is a short road to psychosis. the job of a parent is to let down a child in a structured way, to gently introduce them into the misery of existence.

Since I'm enrolled in DataCamp's Data Analytics course, I plan to explore the correlation among over-protection, anti-fragility, and different self-reported mental health models. Recently, I came across an insightful opinion piece discussing the notion of mental health as a quantifiable scale, despite its heavy reliance on biased data.

https://andrewjtaggart.com/2020/08/20/theres-no-such-thing-as-mental-health/

Robert Greene, author of one of my all time favorite books: The Laws of Human Nature :

"Your first impulse should always be to find the evidence that disconfirms your most cherished beliefs and those of others. That is true science. "

 

"The truth is that we humans live on the surface, reacting emotionally to what people say and do. We form opinions of others and ourselves that are rather simplified. We settle for the easiest and most convenient story to tell ourselves."

- Robert Greene, The Laws of Human Nature

You can learn Robert Greene's Laws through these YouTube videos: 

Part 1: 

Part 2: